Spring Equinox

BST point to point run

Since the run is still fresh on my mind, I’ll try and get some thoughts down. I think I’m risking premature reflections while it still feels surreal but then again maybe that will produce better writing. Using an objective recap to branch into some subjective speculation is probably my route here. To give some unnecessary context right now it’s Tuesday morning and I finished running on Sunday around 5pm and from what I can tell I feel fine, I biked and ran yesterday and everything checks out and is firing properly. And finally before I start, I wrote some things down regarding my feelings or whatever leading up to to the run. I’ll link it right here but I must say I haven’t gone back to read that and if I did I’d probably cringe so please don’t hold it against me. I’ve died and been reborn many times since then.

Friday and Saturday were pretty important in regards to run prep. I didn’t have any worries about the physical aspect, I had some shakeouts and felt great so that was comforting. I always seem to drop the ball in the final days leading into a big effort but this time I was not interested in that. I’ve got some kind of proactive bug lately so that played a nice roll in my errands, on Friday I stopped at Winco and bought most of my nutrition. That included dates, dried mango, walnuts, bananas, crystalized ginger, pop tarts, and sesame snaps. I’m so tired of the shit food and gels so I wanted to give an honest go at more wholesome nutrition, the pop tarts were mostly just for emergency and I only ended up eating one of them around mile 13 but I’m getting ahead of myself. On that same note, sometimes I wonder if after a long effort I’m recovering from the run or from all the sugar inflammation?

Anyways on Friday I prepped drop bags with ziplock bags of the date, walnut, and dried mango mix and baked a big loaf of banana bread. The bread was intended to be allotted throughout the run but I ate half of it almost immediately and decided to gift the rest to Jack and George in fear that I’d eat the whole thing before the run even started. Around 5 I did an hour shakeout from the zoo area to ease some stress and then got home for an earlyish dinner. I had a big spinach salad, a bowl of this creamy tomato basil pasta (I made a big batch and ate it for dinner 5 nights in a row), and then a bunch of chocolate chip cookies I also prepped a few days before. It felt like the perfect night before dinner.

On Saturday I tried to sleep in but only made it until 8ish before the birds by my window were barking up a storm, no complaints here, but I knew I’d be set up for a nice nap later. The plan was to start around 11pm so I had all day to do the freak out and calm down cycle. In the mid morning I spun the bike around town for 12 miles and kept a slow drip of herbal tea going. I put some final touches on the drop bags, there would be 4 of them and it was entirely overwhelming trying to pack with the forecast saying 100% chance of snow/rain starting Sunday morning. The first aid would be a little re up at Spring Canyon Hill TH, the second on Jesse Rich’s porch since I’d be passing right by it around mile 22ish, the third would be Peakview TH and I gave that bag to Grant, the fourth bag had all my post run kit for Jack and George at the end. Once those were sorted I took a solid 2 hour nap and then ate a mid sized tray of vegetable sushi from the grocery store. Pretty much everything was in order so I took another 1 hour nap and woke up about 9pm. I left my house and dropped off the aid bags and met up at Jack/Georges house for some tea.

Sam, who would be joining the run from the start all the way to Alpine, also met at Jack/Georges house and once the forecasted rain didn’t show up, Jack kindly drove us to the trail in City Creek Canyon. Just like that we took the first of many steps starting at about 11:35pm on Saturday night. 7:30am would be the sunrise, so the only vague goal at that point was trying to orient ourselves going up draper alpine road around then and being at Peakview TH for some morning coffee with Caleb, Grant, and Morgan.

I don’t recall stopping even once from City Creek to Emigration Canyon, just a nice easy pace to pass the time. That section came and went and we had some easy road to Spring Canyon Hill TH, where I stashed a bottle and some food. The food was a pop tart that soiled my stomach, it was so off putting I decided to never perceive one again. Dealing with getting my stomach back in order was a multi hour ordeal but it was also a good thing because it kept the pace at bay. We crossed I80 and cruised the road through Olympus Cove, passing by Jesses house I replenished my liquids and switched out some food.

Now for Z to Heughs, the nicest section of trail thus far. It was good to look back at the capitol building at that point, we’d moved a significant amount with little to no effort. There’s a point when you’re nearing Heughs that you bend east and get the first glimpse of the cottonwoods and well as the silhouette of Suncrest. If there’s a positive connotation for the word daunting then that was what I was feeling. I washed my face in the creek running down Heughs and ate a good amount to get myself right for the long road section ahead.

Spitting out of Heughs means we were starting the longest and last real road section of the route. Heughs to Hidden Valley TH, I forgot the mileage but it was probably 7 or 8 rolling ones. I hadn’t been thinking about pace yet, only effort, but I figured it would pay off if we could cruise like 9 minute miles. 8:30-10:00 was kind of the pace range for anything on the flatter side and 10:30-13:00 for the miles with more climbing. So yeah we clicked about 9 min average there and we both felt great, leaning into the hills and just chipping away. We were pretty on pace for sunrise near the top of Corner Canyon. I had brought by debit card just in case we needed something from the 711 on Fort Union but we were sitting fine.

I shot a text to Caleb as we past Little Cottonwood canyon, I said we were moving good and would be able to run all the steps from Hidden Valley to Peakview. That was good incentive to keep moving well but I will say I had some regret running right past the Lower Bells and Rocky Mouth trails. A real gang member would have done the Lower Bells climb to the reservoir and then dropped down to the south parking lot. Also should have picked up the trail at Rocky Mouth and taken that to Hidden Valley but now I know.

We got to Hidden Valley at the same time that the first light of day was showing. A calm blue was being projected across the valley and the Oquirrs. The sun coming up is always an energy boost and I was realizing I felt like I hadn’t expended any energy yet, which is a good feeling 40 miles into a run. The night was over before we knew it and it had be so pleasant. Was going short tights, short sleeves, and no gloves, I bet it didn’t even dip below 40 degrees all night.

You can see the Peakview TH from Draper alpine road and I knew Caleb, Morgan, and Grant were up there waiting with coffee, bananas, and the drop bag I gave to Grant which contained fresh socks and shoes. I think I pr’d the climb I was feeling good and excited to be basically right on schedule with no issues. There was infinitely less mud than I imagined on that road, that is typically the all time muddiest zone. Yet another blessing from the Wasatch god of mud.

Peakview is a significant arrival, it’s basically the halfway point and is a real divider in the mountains. Leaving Salt Lake County you get the first views to the south of the second half of the route, I was very happy to be there on time. About 8:30am and 43 miles in I took 10-15 minutes to change kit, eat, drink coffee, and get myself right for the long descent that essentially lasts until the American Fork Canyon Crossing. I started the run in altra mont blancs (thank you Jimmy), and switched to sportiva akashas (thanks Sam Grant). It’s a great feeling to go from zero drop to 6mm drop deep in an effort.

We eased into the descent to three falls and had a good pace going. The morning was so nice and all things considered I felt fresh and spry. Everyone was vibing, it was hard not to in such pristine conditions. We got well at the falls and were rolling through the Alpine area with ease. The forecast was definitely looming, precipitation was inevitable and it was only a matter of time before it was coming down.

Sam peeled off in the neighborhood since thats where his house is, I’m super grateful for his company through the night and hope that I can repay him sometime.

Approaching American Fork Canyon I was still feeling good, the rain started as we crossed the road and met with Michael Braman at the mouth. I ate a significant amount there, about two handfuls of cashews, an apple, a lara bar, and something else I’m forgetting.

We started heading towards the BST trailhead just south of Mahogany and it was raining strong now. Caleb and Morgan had the navigational authority from three falls, all through Alpine, and now from AF canyon to Battle Creek. I much appreciated that, it alleviated a lot as I was trying to monitor my body. Not to mention the mental toll that running in persistent wet conditions takes.

From Dry Creek Canyon area in Alpine to Battle Creek I felt somewhat disoriented. It was socked in and the clouds kept us from seeing the next canyon, which is cool conditions in my opinion, but it had me in a tunnel for sure. I was in my head then but still having a good time.

Arriving at Battle Creek I was back in familiar territory and used that as momentum to cruise good paces. It was very muddy and undulating so we weren’t blasting miles but I’m happy with the progress. At that point too I was feeling strong enough that all the grades felt runnable beside a kicker here and there.

Alex had planned on parking in Provo Canyon and running the route in reverse to meet up with us, but the rain/snow kept us from communicating so we whiffed on that. Alex still had a nice 10 miler though. The lac of communication was occurring as we were running past Dry Canyon. Before the run I was thinking it would be nice to take the higher trails maybe up Battle Creek or near Little Baldy, but the conditions were not conducive for any side quests like that.

We got to Dry Canyon and decided to take the low trail to the fire road and drop down the single track to Mt Timpanogos Park. That’s where Caleb, Morgan, and Grant shut it down and Sam picked them up. I’m indebted to all of them and hope one day I can repay in whatever form that may be. :)

Alex was hanging at Bridal Veil Falls so Michael and I jogged up the bike path past Nunns Park and said whats up to Alex. That was good and brief, and we got right in to the climb.

It’s the same climb Squaw Peak 50m does up to Hope Campground right off the bike trail. I was about 67 miles in and was pleasantly surprised to be running a decent pace uphill. Heart rate was low and body felt good but it was now snowing and the trail was sopping. I knew the gully section of the climb I would be reduced to a hike so I ran all the steps to the bottom that. The gully was nasty to be honest, so muddy and slick and the snow got deeper every step. There weren’t any tracks but that’s familiar territory. I was actually glad to be moving on snow so I could cycle different muscle groups. I marched up the kicker and got to Hope Campground and was met with basically impassable snow. All we had to do was bump over to Squaw Peak road and then to Rock Canyon campground but that would have simply been not possible in those conditions. It was knee to quad deep post holing in razor blade crust and it would have taken us two hours to get to the top of Rock Canyon. It was also actively snowing and the temps were dropping fast.

We poked around to see if there was an easy path to the road but ultimately didn’t have much of a choice but to descend back down to the BST and cut over to the paved section of Squaw Peak Road. At the bottom of SP road, back at Provo Canyon, I decided I was cool with ending there. There were a lot of factors that made that feel like that was a good decision. One being that I was still in tact and feeling good at mile 74, another being that trying to connect that area to Slate seemed a bit forced. It’s not the cleanest route, I think it’s almost necessary to access Rock to Slate from SP road, but that’s just a matter of aesthetics. So yeah in my ideal route I’d continue down to Slate via the high route but at that point I was more than happy to end on a high note.

Michael had Emily come pick us up, and that was the crux of the entire route, sitting on the side of the road in Provo Canyon pretty disoriented and cold. :)

Emily drove me to Slate Canyon where George was waiting in his car with my dry clothes and a warm car. Jack was with George but he had ran over to Rock Canyon and all the way up the canyon and even was plowing towards to Hope Campground to theoretically meet Michael and I. He didn’t have his phone so I couldn’t inform him of the changes but I knew he would read the snow up there and also conclude that it was impassable. So George and I waited in the car for a sec and eventually saw Jack cooking oats down the BST. Jack got to the car at about 6 and it felt good to have it all wrapped up at a reasonable hour.

George drove us to Dona Mary and we all stung our burritos, pretty much the whole reason for running that far. The drive home went by smooth, thank you George, and that’s about all I remember.

I’m not going to go back and read that so as always, I’m sorry for any incoherency. Also I have a feeling that was a rather dry and boring recount of the day, I guess that’s what I meant by objective. I’m going to burn one down and try for a sec to insert some speculation or more internal take aways, hopefully without too much pedantry.

It is difficult to use something static, like words, to convey a dynamic experience and approach. A one dimensional mindset is an exhaustible resource so adaptability is at the top of the pyramid. I’m not in control, nor do I want to be, so it would be self deluding to lay out an idea of how I want things to go because the more a day strays from that idea the more cause for panic, doubt, etc. If I can build the foundation of my mental temperament with adaptability and fluidity then I’m almost immune to all of the bummers that come with a rigid plan or expectations.

Unresisting is the word I’m really getting at. Conditions and morale fluctuate throughout the day, those fluxes are harmless in themselves until you try to resist them. Like a Chinese finger trap ya know there’s no being stuck until you’re trying to get unstuck. There’s no feeling bad until you’re trying to feel good. For me it is safe to have preconceived notions of unattachment, it allows my temperament to operate independently without the reliance of comfort or external stability.

Whenever I establish a foundation like that I can monitor my physical conditions with little to no panic, I can project ahead in the run without anxiety, and I can navigate the external conditions as they come.

I have mantras and queues that help reinforce the unresisting spirit. Other ways to feel the unresisting thing is to actively give permission to any feeling that arises. Say that there is a climb giving you feelings of discomfort and then panic because there are many climbs to go, I would say to myself, ‘this climb and these feelings are allowed to be here, as allowed as any other feelings, Am I doing something to resist this feeling?’ If there is something you are doing to resist that feeling then it will likely reveal itself when you inquire, then you can use that as a perfect opportunity to expand what you welcome in your spectrum of feelings. The more expanded your spectrum, the less bummers there are to get caught up in.

Opportunities to expand are everywhere, in things and in people. Anything you encounter can be an opportunity to raise your vibration level. In any interaction (with conditions or people) we have the freedom to emphasize whichever version of the interaction we’d like. There’s unlimited versions available to us. For example, during the run around 10am it started to rain, I had the freedom to emphasize how inconvenient or difficult it could be and I also had the freedom to emphasize how refreshing and spring-like it was. I try to remember this when engaging with anything, and if I continue to expand my capacity to accept and let go, then everyone of those opportunities scoots me a little closer to nirvana. It’s almost fool proof because anything that becomes a mental hangup is just clear as day showing me what I’m attached to, and since it’s revealed I can just hit the transcend button and move on. Nothing will come up that has already been transcended, it’s such an efficient way to raise vibration levels and the longer I go the more opportunities present themselves.

I guess that touches on what’s happening on a micro level, it doesn’t convey all if it obviously but those are some the attitudes I try to have in place. If I keep going I’ll just tie myself in a widow maker knot so I’ll stop there and speculate later. And yes just to reiterate it is speculation and theory, sometimes those perspectives feel natural and other times they’re unattainable. That’s fine too, I need both.

In regards to a bigger picture perspective it’s pretty much the same story. The impetus for this effort was to use running as a medium for gratitude. Gratitude for spring time running in the Wasatch. I’d like to make it clear that there was no suffering or going hard involved, it’s likely I would have quit as soon as I felt that. I am weary of the toll it takes to arrive at a theoretical or physical destination through such negative emphasis. Running to me is not a matter of motivation, motivation implies resistance and I have no interest doing things I don’t want to do. It would be a massive squandering of energy to run this route with an emphasis on the performative aspect. The going hard, the look at me, the sufferfest, type 2, whatever. I think there will be a time I feel differently and will see the role that those perspectives plays and I will have to eat my words and allow it to exist in me. After all, I am aware that at least the potential for that exists in me already. For now though I’m set free to find a new illusion. :)

For the sake of redundancy, if you theoretical person made it this far, please excuse grammatical errors and undercooked thoughts I will not be going back to read this possibly ever.